Baked tortilla chips

Sprouted corn tortillas
I’ve spent the better part of the past two weeks holding my breath (figuratively, not literally), waiting for a phone call that hasn’t come. People claim that no news is good news, but I’m going to go ahead and say that whoever came up with that saying had no idea what the hell they were talking about. Especially when the news on which you’re waiting has the potential to drastically alter your life. (I really wanted to say “ruin” but my emotions have a tendency to be overly dramatic, as of late. Look at me, being all self-realized and stuff.)

In attempts to avoid going crazy, I’ve been using Google to convince myself that the symptoms are a direct result of vitamin B12 deficiency, and have absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I used to love sniffing gasoline as a kid. But since Google doesn’t have it’s medical license, I’ve been trying to wrap my head around what could be happening within the confines of my circulatory system. Would they really put me through all of these tests if it was as simple as a B12 deficiency? Why didn’t they test for that? Or did they? And why didn’t they warn me about the fact that the hematologist was going to come in and feel up the swollen glands in my armpits and pelvic region? I MEAN SERIOUSLY. That kind of thing needs to come with a warning. Same goes for tiny humans.

Tortilla chips in the making

While we’re on the subject, I think it’s important to inform future hospital goers that harassing the medical laboratory scientists, until they release the results to your doctor, doesn’t make them run your tests any faster. Nor does bribing them with cookies, money or marijuana. Ok, so I never actually bribed them with marijuana. But if they’re stupid enough to pass up HOMEMADE COOKIES, I think it’s safe to say they’d pass on the ganja, too (I say that like I know what I’m talking about, I have no idea). All I’m saying is, don’t waste your time – you’ll just end up looking like a fool. Especially when they realize your parents misspelled Ashley back in 1988. WAIT. Someone purposely spelled your name like this? Yes, my parents are assholes.

Just kidding. Kind of.

So we’re waiting. And hoping and praying and begging the Universe to send some good news our way. Meanwhile, I’m eating my weight in homemade tortilla chips and guacamole. It’s good for the soul, and good for gaining 10 pounds, too.

Tortilla chips

If you’re like us, you’re no stranger to buying those $1 bags of off-brand tortilla chips (at the rate Thom goes through them, it’s all we can afford). But lately, I’ve been a tortilla chip snob and have only allowed the authentic variety in our pantry. Except at $5 a bag, I figured why not make our own? They’re healthier (read: not fried in oil) and fresh. Super duper fresh. And wildly addictive. Yes, that’s a warning.
BAKED TORTILLA CHIPS

12 6″ sprouted corn tortillas
1/4 cup sunflower oil
1 tbsp fine sea salt
Juice of one lime, optional

Preheat oven to 350˚F. Line two large baking sheets with parchment paper; set aside. Brush each tortilla (both sides) with the oil, then cut into eight triangles. Line the triangles on the prepared baking sheets; sprinkle with salt and lime juice, if using. Bake at 350˚F for 4 minutes, then rotate baking sheets and bake for an additional 4-5 minutes. Remove from oven and immideately transfer to a plate lined with a couple layers of paper towels (this will absorb any excess oil). Serve with salsa or guacamole, or enjoy them as is.

Yield: 96 chips

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22 thoughts on “Baked tortilla chips

  1. oh my goodness, lady! what the heck is going on? from what you wrote, i gather you may have…cancer? here's to hoping no news IS good news. although, i'd HOPE they'd give you a courtesy call to let you know there's nothing to worry about! i had a possibly similar situation happen to me a few years ago. got a catscan and waited by the phone…no phone call came. but, luckily, a family friend who worked at the hospital got a hold of my results..and so my mind was temporarily set at ease..thinking of you xo and your quest to gain 10lbs. although, i highly doubt you will due to your intense physical activity 😉

  2. Baking chips is one of my favorite tricks for quick snacks! Especially considering that the packs of 100 corn tortillas cost less than half the price of most of the premade chips around here. 🙂 Health problems can be awfully scary, especially when you don't know what's happening–I hope you get good news soon!

  3. In case you have a low white blood cell count or platelet count, note that my partner has been "diagnosed" with that for 20 years with no leukemia in sight. He's told to take B12.Thanks for this recipe. Myself, I'm hoping to figure out how to make fake Stoned Ground Wheat Thins to replace the household habit, although I'm also trying to avoid wheat, just in case.

  4. I am so sorry you've been going through all of that yucky hospital stuff lately. I've been through that too, so I totally feel you right now. I hope things get settled soon and that you can put your mind to rest. Sending you big hugs. Baked chips are the best chips. These look wonderful. Happy Blogiversary! 🙂

  5. The chips look fantastic. I'm not a big chip person, but would totally dig into them. I've been through lots of tests at the hospital and totally understand your frustration. It took 3 weeks for me to find out the results of a brain MRI to see if I had MS (I don't, they finally did a simple blood test to find out that I have hypothyroidism). I hope you get good news and that it doesn't take too much longer. Waiting is the pits!

  6. Wow Ahslae, I'm so sorry that you have to go through all of this. Waiting for results is so incredibly stressful and I hope that you get them soon and that you are ok. You are definitely in my thoughts.I love making homemade baked tortilla chips. There is no better dip that guacamole. Yours looks delicious!

  7. Lovely!! They look so crunchy! We go through a ton of tortilla chips around here as well. I just love the sprouted corn tortillas and always have them on hand. Hilarious about the spelling of your name because I always wanted my "ashley" spelled more creatively. 🙂

  8. Hope everything turns out all right! Health issues can be terrifying, I know. Sending positive energy your way. Also, I have a big pile of corn tortillas in my freezer and I think they will be turning into crispy chips soon!P.s. cannot get that raw apple pie I saw on instagram off my mind, can't wait for the recipe!

  9. Thank you for this recipe! I've never made chips before, but your photos look really yummy and I'd like to try it. Can you substitute the sunflower oil with olive oil or coconut oil?

  10. Wishing you a very positive outcome in an inevitably scary time. The humour in your posts is so wonderfully refreshing especially considering what you are going through. Keep at it…staying positive is half the journey. And keep on eating those chips!

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